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Butterfly on flower!
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I have a confession to make, I'm weary! It was less of a weight last week, but this week it's full blown heavy! Let me look that up real fast to make sure I'm using the right word. Yep, it's the right word. Feeling or showing tiredness, esp, as a result of excessive exertion or lack of sleep. For me this means; more than necessary physical or mental effort. I think I can throw in emotional and spiritual effort too.
I found it very interesting that in talking with my spiritual director he suggested that I look at weary and ask why it's hanging around.
Have you ever thought about doing something like asking your weariness why it's there? Well, up until a few years ago, ok it may have been months, I had never thought about doing anything but begging God to take it away from me.
So I've been asking weary; What is your intent here? How long is the duration going to last? What do I need to do to make you go away!?
The answers I seem to be getting are: Invitation, as long as it takes, pay attention.
I'm going to do more asking. I'm also going to step back and see if the view is any better from back there.
Sometimes, we have to stop being The Creator and be the creation! I've been thinking about this for awhile. When I play creator, I gotta be honest with you, it flat out wears me out! I just can't keep up with everything and when the control starts to slip from my fingers, all I can do is watch it and cry out, "WHY!?" I try harder to gain that control back, to keep my eyes on the hundreds of things that need my control and input.
Let me share something that happens a lot with me and The Creator, I crack Him up! I can see Him in my minds eye just having a big ole belly laugh at my plans and concerns about everything.
One of the most important things that happened for me while at seminary was the healing I received for playing creator. I now know how much better things are when I do my part and only my part. I can not force people to know Jesus, I can only let Him live in me and change my life. I can not make people like me or respect my thoughts, I can only be true to what Jesus is calling me to do.
Now this upsets folks, and I gotta say, that would be their issue not mine. I am learning to let them be and do what I'm doing anyway. But here's the deal, if they would stop being the creator and would be the creation, I wouldn't bug them so much!
It's a known fact that I can't be put in a box. They try and hold the Preacher's Wife card over my head and I walk away from that cuz their idea isn't what God has for me. Really, you can try it, and when you get me in that box, just watch what happens.
I know who my Creator is, He calls me by name and I come when I'm called. After Him, I take marching orders from the Preacher man, and that's just about it.
I'm having a reset happen to me. I slyly look up to heaven out of the corner of my eye and I see my Creator nod with approval. I am His creation! I march to the beat of His drum. He has me and all the plans I will ever need all in His control.
So now, as the creation I was made to be, I will go out this day and be 100% who He is calling me to be!
Wanna run through the sprinkler with me?
"You are now running on reserve power and your screen has been dimmed. Please plug in your power adapter to begin recharging the battery. OK?" - Message from an Apple Computer.
Kinda says it all doesn't it? We get to a point in our life where we have got to recharge. There is just no way around it. Some, who ignore the message, will find themselves in the hospital, undergoing forced recharging. It's slow, often painful and costs plenty.
So why don't we heed the messages? For me, there's a part of me that thinks, if I can just keep moving, pushing through, I'll get it all done. It's a lie, straight from the great lier of all times. But I find that I listen, then I find that my reserve power is running low.
My Mini is the same way, she has a reserve light with sound that goes off when the fuel is getting low. Granted, we can go another 70 miles, which ends up being about a week, on that amount of gas. The point being, someone better be listening to the message.
I challenge you today to allow yourself to be refilled, in whatever way that looks like for you. It will need to be purposeful, intentional and kind.
Have you ever thought about doing something like asking your weariness why it's there? Well, up until a few years ago, ok it may have been months, I had never thought about doing anything but begging God to take it away from me. 
