Monday, January 20, 2014

Funk!

Do you ever get into a funk? Is that a crazy question or what? I'd like to put on my holy pants and say Why, no, I never get in a funk! That would be unchristlike, or something! Here's my question: Those 30 years that Jesus was growing up and learning, do you think he got in a funk? Do you think he ever wondered What the sam hill is going on and why do I have to make tables?

It's not that I've figured it all out, but I did come across something this morning that has cleared my way a little, and maybe it will shed some light on your place in the world.

Sorrow, under the power of divine grace, makes us move more slowly and considerately and examine our motives and attitudes. 

God never uses anyone to a great degree until He breaks the person completely. ~ Streams in the Desert

Now I find the first one pretty true. The second one, well, it wears me out! I think, no, God would never break me completely! Then I remember Joseph and how he suffered for years before God used him to save a nation. I think about Moses in the desert for 40 years, hanging out with sheep before he got to lead his people out of slavery. The Bible is full of the example, and if you look long enough, those people are in your life too.

So why would I think that sorrow would skip by me? Why do I feel as though I need to be doing something and checking it off the big list in the sky? Then I saw the word wrestle… to contend, as in a struggle for mastery; grapple: to wrestle with one's conscience. Great!

So I'm in a time of sorrow, and I'm wrestling, that's a sad fighter huh? But where I am is right where God needs me to be in order to hear what he has for me. I'm struggling with waiting, no job that gives a paycheck (cuz you know that's where worth comes from), cleaning the house, taking care of Preacher man, feeding the dog, and why we can't get this well water figured out! Everything, flat out everything is a struggle!

The cool thing, is now I knowing that. Now I can breath, cuz it's all gift from God! Now, I can stop and ask questions like Why do I always have to start over? I don't truly expect an answer, I expect an understanding. A knowing if you will. I understand who is after my light and my joy. I understand that God is teaching me a new thing even if it's not that new! Wrestling takes on a new look to me now and I'm not as sad about it. Now, I'm still in sorrow, but it's sorrow with a purpose. A God purpose, for me. The question then becomes, will I learn it?

This Little Light of mine!


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