Saturday, June 9, 2012

17 Days!

17 day's! That's it! I act like the end of the world will come, or maybe things will change in the United States and someone will shoot Obama, but alas, only the last day to be living in this house, on this street, in this town. That's all, and that's enough.

We had it all lined out, really we did. Mom and Dad were going to show up, load their ride with stuff, load the UHaul with motorcycle and plants. Preacher man in Chevy, loaded with strange long, don't fit anywhere else things. Me in Ford with back  full, and off we would go early Friday morning to Sherwood to unload and leave said Bike and Chevy. It was really a great plan. It had all the makings of something to be remembered in the annuals of history, really, it did. As it is with some many things in life, you better have a plan B and, unlike the General Conference of the UM church, this one better be voted in!

Yazi on heater vent in Wilmore
I went to Fort Smith for supervision from Sister Rachel on Thursday. This was the day that Preacher man and I had decided to have Yazi put out of his prolong ill heath. It was not something either of us wanted to happen, but we had kept Shy (our 1st dog) alive for over a year after she should have been allowed to pass on and I swore than, I would never do that to another animal, ever again! All I can say about that is Shy and Fred were waiting for him and I'm sure they are having a blast! 

Also, on Thursday, the beloved Chevy of 25 years, starting making strange noises that Preacher man couldn't figure out, and it started stopping when it shouldn't. Long story short, alternator was dead, along with a oil gauge line thingy. We pick her up today. Needless to say the Chevy is still in Rogers. I have told Preacher man, that while my skills are great, I don't know, nor do I want to try, to drive two trucks at the same time to Sherwood.

Yazi loved Sam!
So here's my question: How come when it starts going bad, everything in the world wants to jump on that wagon and ride it to it's firey death? It's one of those, what else is going to happen, kinda times for us right now. Things are looking good down the road, but we can't even get out of the driveway with out getting flattened! This may not seem like a lot to you, but there is other stuff going on behind the scenes that I'm not going to bore you with. Things like annual conference, spiritual direction cohort issues, people, money and by the way, it's starting to get hot!

This is about the time that I really expect the heavens to open and God to start smiting, but instead, He shows me the Poverty of Spirit book by Metz and I open it and read. 
Becoming a human being involves more than conception and birth. It is a mandate and a mission, a command and a decision. We each have an open-ended relationship to ourselves. We do not possess our being unchallenged: we cannot take our being for granted as God does. Nor do we possess it in the same way as other creatures around us. We are challenged and questioned from the depths of our boundless spirit. Being is entrusted to us as a summons, which we are each to accept and consciously acknowledge. We are never simply a being that is "there" and "ready-made," just for the asking. From the very start we are something that can Be, a being who must win selfhood and decide what it is to be. We must fully become what we are - a human being. To become human through the exercise of our freedom - that is the law of out Being.

Yazi loves his fly swater!
To become, is what it's about. God is always wooing us to Himself to become what we were put here to become, fully human, in the moment, living now and present! We are hit from every side in order to pull us off this course of being, to muffle the sound of God's voice so that we react in self pity and anger. I'm right there! This pity party is rocking the house and I'm the only one that's shown up. So today, I stop it and I get back to the business at hand, Being!

That's not to say I won't be packing boxes, cleaning toilets, brushing dogs, feeding Preacher man, yelling at squirrels and going to baseball games! I still gotta be me, but I can do it with poverty of spirit. I can be as God is calling me to be.          

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