Got up at around 3:30 am so I might as well share what's been going on this morning huh? I have been struggling with identity for a while longer than I thought I had been. I seem to have a need of a title for some strange reason. I think it stems from having to fight to get them and knowing that with position comes pay or something like that. I fought for my title of Executive Director when I was running the soup kitchen, but really liked the title of Queen. I hate the title of Administrative Assistant for anyone and think Slave works much better. This all is coming up because the Admin. Asst. job I left at Asbury is now a Manager of Life Long Learning. Really people...Manager?
Anyway, people are starting to ask "What is Kim going to be doing when you get to Rogers?" and I'm sure my mom and dad are hearing it too. It was also something that came up when I went to my Spiritual Director last week, so this is what we got. First off I'm going to be praying for people and looking for the needs of others no matter what they call me. I will walk beside and with others through their walk and encourage them. I will be doing healing prayer and ministering to hurting people. Instead of being called "That crazy Lady that prays for everybody" the term "Prayer Minister" came to mind and I really like it. I have waited over three days to write about it - could it be cuz I don't believe it can be true? It's hard to let it soak in, something with the word Minister in it surely is too big for the likes of me!
I will admit when I saw that, let's call her Ginny, had gotten the new title, it did bother me. It also bothered me that a pay raise goes along with that title. "Oh Father, take that from me!" Mine is a different path now - that one led to this one and this is the better one! So I picked the right thing when I quit that job. I would not be where I am right now had I stayed working.
So, I think I'll have business cards made up with that title on it just to show everyone that I'm serious here. It's not so much that I'm serious as it is that God is. I'm sure that He really doesn't care what my title is, He cares that I do what He is calling me to do.