Much to my disbelief, we are in contract with this house. I am learning that this is a lesson in faith and dying to self. I asked God when these lessons would stop, and He said when I stopped listening. So here is the lesson learned. Alex and I have been praying for a buyer, and now we have one. It is not the amount I would have liked, so we took out the washer, dryer and fridge, said closing would be on or before June 1, and that the buyer would fix anything that the VA loan people found wrong with the house. They signed it! I really thought we had stacked it so that it wouldn't be something they were OK with.
When we got word of this, I just sat there, and grief came over me. Why do I always have to be the one to give up so much? We have done so much to this house, and now we aren't reaping anything from it. This yard is 100-percent better than it was when we moved in, and no one seems to see it. A cry from my very heart of "unfair" came to mind, and I pouted. This lasted until I woke up at 4 in the morning with a deep sense that God had something for me. So I asked, and this is what I got: How many houses are for sale in Wilmore right now? (Many.) How many people have you heard of that are breaking even on their houses? (Not many.) How many can't even sell their houses? (Many.) Of the rather large class of graduates, how many are going to be commissioned this summer? (Not many.) So. Missy Smarty Pants, how blessed are you really? (VERY.)
So the faith lesson in this is: "God sent it; therefore it must be good for me," not "I see this is good; therefore God must have sent it." There really is a difference. The dying-to-self lesson in this is: "I will never leave you or forsake you." We have given up a lot in our life, material things, but Jesus said, "Sell all that you have and follow me!" We have also gained so much that has nothing to do with material stuff. It has everything to do with being open to His calling on our life, to having a marriage that I cannot believe I have, and don't deserve it at all. To be filled with the awe and the joy of what He might have in store for His people. The joy that comes from being His hands and feet is something that I pray all would know. "The Lord is my chosen portion and my cup; you hold my lot." Psalm 16:5 Now I'm off to pack boxes!