I'm doing a study by Joyce Rupp called "Open the Door," but she uses the image of the door as an invitation to growth and awareness. I'm at the point where I don't know how much more awareness I can handle! The reflection question today was, "What door of change are you currently going through?" So here are some of my thoughts on that question. Oh my gosh: “What door of change am I not going through?” might be easier to answer. Well, let's see: 1) Leaving seminary life for ministry (church) life; 2) Going from being filled to pouring out; 3) Not being seen to being unable to hide; 4) Knowing where we are to being unsure of where we're headed. That's enough for now!
Maybe instead of different doors, it's just one large doorway, which is kinda scary to go through, because I can't hold onto the doorframe to steady myself. Maybe that's why it's so big—so Alex and I can walk through it together, side-by-side, holding hands instead of doorframes. That's better, I think, even though I know I will be going through my own doorways alone, I look forward to going through this one of change together.
I keep thinking that waiting is the hardest part of this whole process of getting appointed to a church. There is this huge buildup of expectations of where we might be going, and I so hate being let down or disappointed. That's the way of the world, and I have to remember that I am being changed into a new creation and don't need to concern myself with those kinds of thoughts anymore. However, the flesh dies slow and hard, and I'm not a pro at this yet.
Alex and I have gotten a little game going. You may have been a part of it around Super Bowl time—the squares. So, we have the state divided into sections (NE, NC, NW, Little Rock, SE, SC, SW), and then we have what Alex might be doing (Senior Pastor, Assistant Pastor, Special Assignment, 2 Point Charge, 3 Point Charge). $2.00 a square, $35 to the winner if all squares are filled and $35 helps pay for the graduation reception. If anyone wants to play, let me know. There are 17 squares are left