On Saturday, I got on the evil treadmill and did the run/walk for three miles. Wasn't happy about my time, wasn't happy about being on the treadmill, and I wasn't happy about the pain that came in waves in the inner part of my left leg. I started thinking about this injury and why it's taking so long to stop hurting. I know; it's my age. I get into these conversations with God about this kind of thing, and they go something like this: “God, why don't you just heal me so I can keep on training for this half marathon? Don't you want me to be successful at this? I've been trying so hard to be good at this one thing, and now I can't do it, and I'm going to end up sitting on the couch eating Lay's potato chips and cheese and gaining all my weight back, and my life will be over, and I'll never end up doing anything with my life!" I'm sure that if you haven't had this exact conversation with God, yours has come pretty close, huh? Then I had my devotional time, and I got quiet, and I read these words: This is my doing. (1 Kings 12:24) Hmmm, so let me read some more to see what this means. "Have you longed to do some great work for Me but instead have been set aside on a bed of sickness and pain? This is my doing. You were too busy. I could not get your attention, and I wanted to teach you some of My deepest truths." But I want to run!!!! I seem to be coming across this a lot lately—rest, abide with me. This is so hard for me, and you know that God knows it! These are the lessons we don't sign up for. These are the lessons that usually hit us square in the face, and we are heard to say things like, "But God, I want to bring you glory!" I can hear that still, small voice, and it's chuckling at me right now, and you know what? That's OK.
Today, I went and got on the stepsister of the evil treadmill, the elliptical. I plugged up to my iPod, and I smiled at God. For 30 minutes, I moved my legs like a crazy woman and you know what? There wasn't that much pain in my leg! Now I'm a little sore, and I still have a hitch in my giddy-up when I stand up and start to walk, but I'm getting it. “Slow down, rest, abide in me.” I hear ya, God. Really I do!
I don't know if you can see this in the tree or not, but I had to share it with you! I was looking out the back door, and in this tree, I saw some snow in the shape of a running girl! Do you see it? Or am I just crazy?